35.

Today I turn the big 35.  Sometimes I find it hard to believe that I am officially mid thirties and 5 years from 40 -wowza.  I remember at one time thinking that was so old.  40 used to be over the hill.  Now I don't feel that way at all.  Most days I still feel like a teenager at heart.  35 is the new 25 right??

My thirties have been my favorite years yet.  I have grown so much as a person and become truly happy with who I am.  The quote "the less you care the happier you will be" is so true.  Not everyone will like you and that is ok, as long as you are confident and secure in yourself, that is what is important. 

 I have learned that it is not important to have a ton of friends but more important to have handful of real friends you can truly count on.  My girlfriends brighten my life and empower me so much.  I don't know what I would do without them.  

My thirties have taught me marriage is hard and anyone who tells you it is easy is wrong.  It takes work, but like anything else in life you get out of it what you put in.   The things you work the hardest for are the most valuable and treasured things in your life.  My love for Matt grows each year.  

 My thirties have taught me kids are both the hardest and most rewarding thing you will do with your life.  They have also taught me true unconditional love.  My kids are my life simple as that but it is also important to remember to carve out and make time just for you.  Nurturing your soul and spending time alone is a good thing. 

My thirties have taught me to be nice and smile you never what battles someone else is fighting.  It is always better to be kind.  Equally important is not to judge for the same reasons.  We all are doing the best we can in our own paths of our lives.  We should encourage and support each other.  

My thirties have taught me the grass is always greener.  Someone will always have more than you do and that is life and that will never change.  You have to be thankful for what you have because you have more than most people. 

My thirties have taught me the power of prayer and trusting God.  I have grown in my faith these last few years especially since having children and that makes all things in life easier. 

My thirties have made me appreciate my parents in a whole new way.  I respect them as parents and now I consider them among my best friends, in fact more often than not I choose to hang out with them instead of my friends.  I am thankful for our close knit family because family is everything.  I hope Sterling and Frances Moon grow up and love me and want to spend as much time with me as I do my parents.  They are a huge inspiration to me.

Most importantly my thirties have taught me to laugh and enjoy life.   Also that attitude can make or break you.  'The happiest people don't have the best of everything, they just make the best of everything." 

In Honor of my 35th birthday I thought it would be fun to share 35 things you probably don't know about me. 

1) I am addicted to the TV show Buying Alaska.  I don't know what it is but I love seeing people look at properties with no running water and outhouses.  Matt and I look forward to watching it every week.

2) I never leave home without a glass of water.  I take one with me everywhere.

3) I hate brushing my teeth, I despise the taste of toothpaste

4) I have never walked the Cooper River Bridge nor do I even care to.  I think I would get to the middle and have an anxiety attack about being stuck up that high.

5) When I eat pizza I like to eat all the cheese and toppings off and leave the bread.  It drives Matt crazy.

6) I love box mac and cheese.  I know it is so processed and gross but I love it.

7) I like drinking my cocktails out of tiny vintage glasses.  When I travel I always search for small vintage glasses.  I hate a drink in a really large glass.

8) I am weird about meat.  I hate pork tenderloin and steak but love bacon and ground beef.  I also love chicken liver.

9) In high school I kept a calendar and wrote down my outfits everyday so I never repeated the same exact outfit.  I have had a strong love for fashion my whole life.

10) I can not sleep late.  I am up and out of bed even if my kids are still sleeping.

11) I have been coloring my hair since I was 12.  I am obsessed with having my hair super blonde.  I have also had pretty much every hair color from almost black, to red highlights and I feel most comfortable and myself with blonde hair.

12)  I am scared of sharks and will not go in the ocean past my knees

13) I love magazines and always have to buy the newest issues.  I get so excited when I am grocery shopping and see a fresh new magazine.  Sadly they usually just sit around forever because I rarely have time to read them these days.

14) I hate to fly. My two upcoming trips have me stressing out already about flying.   Like break out in sweats, heart palpitations scared to fly.  Alcohol helps:)

15) I make my bed every single day.

16) I put hot sauce on everything.  I always think food needs more flavor.

17) I am sad to admit but I am bored with the Housewives now.  I used to love that show and now it is just too much drama and arguing.  I am over it.  Does that mean I am growing up and maturing??

18)  My three drinks of choice would be white wine, vodka on the rocks with fresh lemon, or good tequila.  I hate mixers and prefer to drink my drinks straight.

19) I was originally accepted to NC State and had said yes.  I had a room mate lined up my very best friend from high school and deposit paid.  I was then accepted to UNC - Chapel Hill second round later around May.  I immediately ditched my plans at NC State.  I choose Chapel Hill and to room with a girl I didn't know that well instead of my best friend but something in my heart told me to go to UNC.  I took a chance and I am glad I did.

20)  Matt and I have been together 14 years this year.  We dated 6 years before he proposed.

21)  I don't like cats- at all. 

22)  I used to want to be a tornado chaser.

23) If I could have any job in the world I would choose to be a fashion stylist- ala Rachel Zoe.

24)  I am a total book worm.  I love to read and collect books especially cookbooks and coffee table books.  I take the kids to the library once a week in hopes they will love books too.

25) I love salads.  Like truly I get excited about salads.  They are my favorite thing to make.

26) Buying good groceries and having good food in the house is one of my favorite indulgences.  

27) My male crushes these days consist of Anderson Cooper, Adam Levine, Zac Efron- and so random I have kind of been crushing on Nick Jonas lately (I blame the music)

28)  I have one eye with blond eyelashes and one eye with black eyelashes

29)  Right after college I went to Real Estate School.  I even worked for a year as an assistant to a realtor and then decided that was not the field for me.  I then worked as an architectural rep for 6 years til I had Sterling.  The economy took a bad turn right before I had Sterling, especially the construction field and I was laid off the week before I had him.

30)  I have never had a spray tan. 

31)  I have traveled out of the country once, when I was 21 I went to Germany and Austria.  In all likelihood I will probably never travel out of the country again because the 8 hour flight about did me in.  However I am glad I got to experience a different culture and part of the world.  I thank my parents for doing that for me and making me board the plane even though I was hysterically crying:)

32)  I think about my grandmother (who Frances was named after) and grandfather everyday.  They were such a huge part in my life and I miss them dearly.  I swear often times there are signs they are nearby and watching over us.

33)  I don't like medicine.  I never take medicine unless I am really sick.  I don't even take Tylenol for headaches.  I hate taking any sort of pills.

34) I wash my face every night, this is one step I never skip

35 ) Birthday wishes.  Truth.

Cheers to 35 Friends.

Losing the Last of the Baby Weight

 That right there is my inspiration body.  I look at it often for encouragement to run or not have seconds.  I mean her body is amazing.  Does my body look like this?  Nah not even close but it provides me with some killer inspiration.

Today's topic is a reader request.  I have actually gotten several emails about this, so I wanted to take the time and write about it.

  I always welcome suggestions so shoot me an email if there is a particular topic you would like me to write about.

Today we shall discuss losing the last of the baby weight and how hard it is.  I am proud to say I finally lost those last 4-5 lbs I was struggling with a few months back.  I actually weigh less now than I did when I got married.  But it took time to get to this point and it was not easy.   I have reached my goal weight but I will be honest I still don't feel totally comfortable in a bikini, my stomach is saggy and I have cellulite.  I do however love my body saggy tummy and all, it housed two healthy babies for 9 months each and that is damn incredible.  What our bodies do is a true miracle.  I will most likely never look exactly like I looked before I had my kids (I know my belly button won't) but this is the new normal and I am ok with that.

The first thing I want to say is truly give your body nine months to get back to normal.  It took you nine months to gain that weight and for your body to expand so it takes time to get back to your pre-baby body.  I remember even when I lost weight my hips and shoulders were still too big to fit in many of my clothes- it takes time for it all to shrink back.  A lot of weight will come off in the beginning and then you will hit a plateau, that holds true for most women.  Don't get discouraged and compare yourself to others or celebrities who seem to bounce back a few weeks after delivery,  that ain't real life.   Your body housed a baby for nine months it will take time to get back to what feels normal for you.  I would say it probably was around when Frances turned one that I hit my goal weight and felt really good about my body.

For me (and remember everyone is different) my weight loss comes more from what I eat than exercise.  I weigh more when I workout more because I end up eating more.  Like right now I am up 2-3 lbs because I have been running more.  I always tend to gain a few pounds when I start exercising more but then it evens off and my body looks way better and tighter.  The initial weight gain is from muscle so don't let it freak you out.  I love to workout for the mental aspect mainly.  I am much happier and I have so much more energy when I work out.  Just last night before I went to bed I told Matt I was feeling so much better since I started exercising more.

I am no expert in this field but wanted to share a few things that worked for me.

ONE | You don't have to workout everyday but when you do workout make it count.  Sweat.  When I workout I workout hard.  Running for me and my body is what works best and burns the most calories and tones me.  It is a full body workout.  Yoga is great too but I have a hard time fitting in time for a class.  Running is easy because I can walk out my door while everyone is still sleeping and be done in 30-40 minutes. I aim to burn around 500 calories when I exercise.

TWO | Make time for exercise.  I go thru phases where a get in a rut and in a bad mood from not working out.  A few weeks ago I thought to myself you are the problem, get your act together.  Now I make it a priority and every other day I wake up at 6:20 and run.  Personally if I don't workout first thing in the morning I will blow it off and make an excuse.  Plus it is a great start to my day and I don't have it hanging over my head all day.  I feel energized and ready to tackle the day.

THREE| Hot lemon water first thing in the morning.  This flushes out your body and helps you digest food easier.  I have stuck with this and really look forward to my water first thing in the morning.  I drink this before my coffee and before I eat anything.

FOUR | Avoid processed foods.  You all know I love food and I would never diet but I do try and avoid eating too many processed foods. Of course if the kids are eating goldfish I eat a few but otherwise I try to stick to fairly clean meals.

FIVE | Eat grapefruit.  I don't know if this a myth but I read somewhere grapefruit ups your metabolism.  I swear when I started eating it in the mornings I lost my last few pounds.

SIX | Try not to weigh everyday it will just drive you crazy.  I weigh about twice a week and sometimes only once a week.  I do feel like it is important to weigh once a week to keep yourself in check.  If I am up a few pounds, I cut back on my eating.  It is a good wake-up call.

SEVEN | Squeeze in exercise when you can.  For me if I don't work out very first thing in the morning I will not get it done.  But often times on days I don't work out, I still try to do squats and leg lifts before bed.  Every little thing helps

SEVEN |Make a new playlist every few weeks.  New music really motivates me to exercise. 

Here is my current one and I have to say Work B**ch is an excellent motivator (gotta love Britney).

EIGHT | Cut back on alcohol- we all know this is hard with small children. I try to have a few days (let's be real two days a week and sometimes that is only one day but I always make that one day happen) with not a drop of alcohol.  It saves so many calories.

As far as meals go here is a typical day of what I eat (this is actually what I ate Tuesday)

Snacks included some crispy peas and two dark chocolate and sea salt squares. 

I only drink water and unsweetened green tea during the day.

I really try not to snack too much.

BREAKFAST

Bread toasted with peanut butter, sliced banana and honey. I also have a cup of hot lemon water and 1 cup decaf coffee.

LUNCH

Veggie sandwich from Atlanta Bread Company + small bag of chips

DINNER

Tuscan Chicken Cakes  + 2 glasses of Rose

There is honestly no quick fix to lose the weight it just takes time.  But exercise and eating clean does help.

I have shared this quote before and I love it.  It relates to so many aspects of life from being pregnant, to having kids and losing the baby weight.  I tell myself this often.

Good luck to all you struggling to lose the last few pounds I know it is hard but it will happen!

Stay confident and love your body!

Scenes From Our Beach Week + Weekend + Grapefruit Habanero Cocktail Recipe

Happy Monday Friends!  This week both Sterling and Frances are in camp so I am hoping to accomplish so many things on my to-do list!  After being out of town two basically back to back weeks I have a list a mile long.

We had such a great week at the beach with my parents and brother and sister.  This is one of the few family pictures we got with all 4 of us and I love it!  

My dress I am wearing was just reduced and is now 40% off.  I am wearing a size small for reference. 

Dress

My mom and sister.

My sweet parents who always make this the most fun week.  They fill goodie bags for the kids and always cook us amazing meals.  I am still dreaming about my Dad's fried shrimp.

The cousins.   It makes me so happy that these little ones are so close and love hanging out together.

 By far our favorite part of the beach was the tidal pools.  The kids loved playing in them and it was stress free for us adults.  I am not a big ocean person (sharks and other things I can't see scare the heck out of me) so I really enjoyed just chilling in the tidal pools.

I bought this pink dress/cover-up during our shopping day in Wilmington at Monkee's.  I am a sucker anything embellished, it also comes in blue.  It is fully lined so technically you could wear it as a dress as well but you would need a tank or special bra underneath.

Cover-up/Dress + Sunglasses

The girls always take one day and go into Wilmington to shop and eat lunch, otherwise we really enjoy just relaxing at our beach house.  One of our favorite restaurants in Wilmington is Brasserie du Soleil.  I am slightly obsessed with their salads, french fries, and mac and cheese.  The Heirloom Tomato and Burrata Salad was a special and it was so good!

This off shoulder dress was perfect for our last night.  I love the fun floral print.  I had a few questions about fit and I found it ran tts.  I am wearing a size 4.

Frances Moon rocking her Marysia Suit.

I can't believe how grown-up Sterling is these days.

Family lunch at the pool.  

The boy cousins minus Rutledge.  So far Frances is the only girl.

We did dinner out one night at a place called Cape Fear Seafood Company.  The food was really good.  Sterling and I shared the fried flounder and osyters and both were very fresh.  Their fried okra was also a favorite.

Dress | Sandals

This picture is blurry and not the best lighting but I love it of me and the kids.

The last night we watched a crazy storm roll in, the clouds were incredible.

We got back Friday afternoon and I quickly unpacked everything.  I always like to unpack as soon as I get home.  Then Matt made us a delicious habanero grapefruit cocktail.   Several of you wanted the recipe.  I don't have exact measurements but here is how you make it:

HABANERO GRAPEFRUIT COCKTAIL

Juice one grapefruit.  We typically microwave the whole grapefruit for about 10-15 secs, this helps more juice come out.  Pour the juice in a martini shaker.  Thinly slice 1 habanero and place in the shaker.  Add vodka and ice and shake well.  Usually the grapefruits are sweet enough on their own but if you find it is not add a little honey to the mixture to cut the sourness.

wearing RT Dress (currently 40% off)

Saturday the kids and I went to the Farmer's Market.  I promptly came home and made gazpacho.  It was good but not great anyone have a recipe they would recommend?

Saturday night Matt and I took it easy and finished Mad Men.  I am so sad it is over, I really loved that show and the characters.  We are thinking about starting back up Bloodline next. 

I picked up this new cookbook after the Farmer's Market and so far I am obsessed.  Every recipe looks amazing.  This detox face works wonders on your skin, I try and use mine twice a week.

Swan Nightgown on sale (also here) + Cookbook + Detox mask

Sunday we went to church and then worked around the house.  I have been living in this Mara Hoffman Stars dress, I love the print (it also comes in a lighter version) and fit.  My Annabel Ingall Tote is also reduced in a few colors.  

Stars Dress (50% off) | Necklace | Purse

I love snapping pictures of the kids are these stairs on our walk to church.   We saw the Secret Life of Pets Saturday and loved it- highly recommend it!  That is Gidget from the movie that Sterling is holding the kids loved her character:)

Have a great day.

Turning 33 + Things I Know

In two weeks I turn 33.  That used to always seem so old to me.   What does seem kind of crazy is that in two years I will be 35, meaning  then I will be 5 years away from 40.  I can remember my mom throwing my dad an "over the hill" party when he turned 40 and thinking wow, that is old.  Things are different now, 40 is like the new 30 and really not that old at all (or at least that is what I tell myself).  Overall I still feel pretty darn young most of the time.  My 33 years have at least taught me some life skills.  I guess it is true you get older and wiser.  It got me thinking about what I have learned in my "old" age plus a few random thoughts.  

- I am sad I no longer get carded for alcohol.  Do I really look that old?  I am hoping the fact that I always have a little one with me is the reason I don't get carded.  Or it could be the dark circles under my eyes and wrinkles.

- For once in my life I am comfortable with my weight give or take 5 lbs.  It took me a long time to learn how to eat to manage my weight but for once I am happy with my body- minus my stomach because lets be real is it ever the same after having a child?

- Which brings me to what I have learned about weight maintenance,  85% of it is what you eat not exercise.  I exercise for my mental sanity and not to be flabby but it is not what makes me lose weight, it is what I put in my mouth.

- Your parents are usually right.  Sometimes you don't want to hear it but for the most part they are right.  Now that I am a parent I look at my parents differently and appreciate their input.  Listen to them they are the two people who always have your best interests at heart.  Sometimes it is hard to hear what they have to say but they will always tell you the truth and be honest like no one else in your life.

- Marriage is hard, really hard.  It takes work.  Planning the wedding is the easiest part of being married.  Having a child makes marriage even harder.  You must have a solid friendship and be willing to compromise to make it work.  After a child it is really important to carve out time for just the two of you to be alone.  Your spouse will annoy you and that is ok and normal.  It is the person you spend the most time with of course you will get on each others nerves.

- Once you have a kid a hangover is just not worth it.  I know my limits now and rarely drink too much.  There is nothing worse than tending to a child while you are hungover.

- Men are clueless you need to spell things out for them- ie what needs to done around the house and what gifts you want.  They are good with a list and ideas.

- Much disappoint is caused by ideas we have created in our heads.  I can't tell you how many times I have gotten upset with Matt for him to reply "I am not a mind reader, we never discussed that."

- I still don't feel like a grown up.  Sometimes I laugh to myself that I am married with a child because at heart I still feel like I am 16.  Do we ever really feel grown-up?  I did feel old while waiting in line to watch Twilight and the Hunger Games though......

- There are so many different kinds of love in life but none as strong as the love you have for your child.  It is the most powerful love ever.  Nothing can compare to it.

- Call your parents and grandparents often.  Even if it is only a 5 minute conversation I can guarantee you it is the highlight of their day.

- It is so important to nurture your relationships with girlfriends.  They get you a way your husbands never will.  You can bitch to them without them getting annoyed.  Men have a short tolerance for complaining but girlfriends don't.  My girlfriends are my happy place they bring so much joy and laughter into my life.

- The expensive version is usually worth it.  Especially when it comes to purses, shoes, and jeans.  They hold up better, last longer and are more comfortable.  

- It is easier to get away with cheap white wine than cheap red wine.  Cheap red wine will cause a real bad hangover.  Don't ever trust a bottle of wine that is less than $5.  That being said you can get some fabulous bottles of wine between $10-15.

- Some of the best beauty secrets are the easiest- drink lots of water and get enough sleep.  Those two things can make a world of difference on your skin.

- Once you have a kid it is nearly impossible to have a clean house.  Just resign yourself to the fact that things will never be put away.  I am always picking crap up, it never ends!

- I am the luckiest person in the world to have a sister.  There is nothing like the bond between sisters.  I love my brother so much but we are not as close as my sister and I are.  If you have two daughters consider yourself lucky that they will have each other growing up.  We always say "Sisters by Chance, Friends by Choice."  Love you Tay!

- Sometimes you just need to eat that cheeseburger, cookie, drink that bottle of wine , etc.  It is important to indulge sometimes and just enjoy life.

- Stay true to yourself.  I went through many stages growing up trying to fit in with others.  Adapting to them and doing things that really weren't me.  Now I am just "me."  If you think I am stupid for loving Reality TV or shopping too much- oh well. That is me take it or leave it.

- Along the same lines don't compare yourself to others, there will always be others with more than you have but that doesn't mean they are happier.  You have way more than alot of other people.  The blog world makes this hard because people are always posting about their fabulous houses, clothes etc.  I am guilty of feeling a little jealous sometimes.  But I try to remind myself how lucky I am and how much I have.  I am blessed.  Some people don't even have a roof over their heads.

- Forgive and Forget always.  A grudge is never worth holding on to.  I am always the first person to apologize I hate being in argument life is too short for that.  It is also to short to spend time hating anyone

- Have some Faith.  Religion has become a really important aspect of my life.  Take time to pray and thank God for all your blessings.

Ok, so spill it, I would love to hear from people older, younger,  and my age on what you have learned thus far in your life?  and if you agree with my thoughts!
Have a great weekend friends!

Happy Friday!

-

A Day in My Life

I have had several requests to do a day in my life post.  My life is not very exciting but here you go! This is a pretty typical day although sometimes things change. 

6:00 

alarm goes off

I usually press snooze once then get out of bed.

I immediately brush my teeth (I hate morning breath) and then I go make my cup of hot lemon water.  After that I go wake Sterling up.  This can take anywhere from 10-15 minutes to get him up.  Why does kindergarten start so early??

Frances usually hears me getting Sterling up so of course she wants to get up too.  

I feed both kids breakfast and make their lunches for the day while they eat.

7:00 

Matt or I take Sterling to school, we usually rotate days depending on his work schedule.  The other stays home with Frances.  After I drop Sterling off I make a cup of decaf coffee and a batch of green juice for Matt and I, then I sit down to finish up my blog for that day and try to respond to a few emails.  I let Frances watch Paw Patrol during this time so I can work.

8:00

I make myself breakfast and if I have time I quickly read a few blogs while I eat. 

Then I do a few household chores like empty the dishwasher (I swear I empty it everyday), start a load of laundry (that is never ending too) and make the beds.  I hate an unmade bed!!  If I am not going to the gym I shower at this point too.  Otherwise I throw on a bit up make-up and workout clothes- and yes I wear make-up to the gym, I don't really go anywhere without make-up.  

  

I also get Frances dressed and ready for the day. I talked her into pigtails today it I am loving them!

9:30

I take Frances to school.  She does Monday, Wednesday and Friday.  

10:00

I hit up the gym.  I do 30 minutes on the treadmill of running intervals, then 20 minutes on the elliptical.  Or on Tuesdays and Thursdays I do an hour barre class.

For those who asked I am still loving my yoga mat.  

11:00 

It is a bad habit but after the gym I usually hit the Starbucks drive thru (I mean its right beside my gym) for an iced green tea.  Then I head to the grocery store.  I also use this time to run other errands I have like post office, dry cleaners, Target etc.

12:00

Head home unload groceries, take a quick shower, and start assembling a salad for lunch.  This week I made one my favorites, Asian Kale Salad.  I usually don't have time to eat before I pick up Frances so I just prep the food.  

12:45 

Pick up Frances from school.  She always falls asleep in the car so I just carry her in and lay her down in her crib and she keeps napping.  Then I sit down and eat lunch.  I usually power thru a show I have recorded like Housewives or Girlfriend's Guide to Divorce while I eat.  

1:30

I use this time to finish up laundry and straighten up the house that is normally a wreck from that morning.  Then I sit down and work on my blog til time to pick up Sterling

2:30 

Pick up Sterling from school.  After school I try and take the kids to do an activity.  We usually have a playdate, hit up the park, go to the library, or make some sort of art/cooking craft at home. Today we stopped by the drug store and then hit up the park.

4:00

Get home and start working on dinner prep.  I let the kids rest and watch tv during this time.  This is what usually happens while I cook,  they pull out everything they can and make a huge mess.

For dinner this night I made Salmon Cakes, squash, and navy beans.

5:30

Dinner for the kids.  If Matt is working late I usually go ahead and eat with them too.  Otherwise I wait and eat with Matt.  Whether I eat or not I at least always try to sit down with the kids and talk while they eat.

We usually do Sterling's homework at this time too after we eat.

I quickly clean up dishes and wipe down counters.

6:00

Bath time.  I used to love bath time, now I dread it.  Sterling and Frances basically fight the entire time, hitting and splashing water everywhere.

7:00

We start the bedtime routines that includes brushing teeth and reading a few books and saying prayers.   Frances still likes to be rocked so either Matt or I rock her for a bit. Then I am not kidding for the next hour or two someone keeps asking for something.  They need water, or Sterling wants a pen to write in his journal, or they need to ask me something- their elaborate list goes on and on.   They are masters at extending bedtime.

8:30/9

The kids are finally asleep and I sit down.  Matt and I don't watch much tv but we do it is usually Netflix.  We are still powering thru Mad Men and loving it.  

This is also when I put on a face mask.  Still loving my Peter Thomas Roth Irish Moor Mud one I got for Christmas.  It is awesome and I really think it has made my skin more even and brighter.

9:30-10

Get ready for bed, wash face, brush teeth, and then I get in bed and read a bit to fall asleep.  I just started 800 Grapes and I am liking it so far.  It is a light and easy read compared to Room which I just finished.

I then sleep stalk my kids and call it a day.

xoxo