Friday, July 25, 2014

These are my Confessions.....


Happy Friday Friends.  It has been awhile since I did one of these posts. Since I shared mine I would love if you shared yours too.

-  I have turned into such a stalker at night while my kids sleep. It is my favorite thing to do, to go in and watch them sleeping.  They are so peaceful and after a long day it makes me so grateful for their sweet angelic faces.

- Lately I have been over every single room in my house.  Feeling like I want to redecorate every room which I obviously can't afford to do.  I am trying to save and re-do things slowly but I like instant gratification.  I am trying to be happy with what I have but sometimes it is hard when I see all these huge beautiful houses on the internet.

- Is it weird I am jealous and envious of Adam Levine's wedding??  I have such a huge crush on him and she is just stunning.  They are kind of a perfect couple.  Plus I love the vibe and location of their wedding.  It should have been me:(   and on a side note are Beyonce and Jay Z really splitting up after the tour??

- I am starting to realize the older you get it is damn hard to loose weight.  I exercise and eat healthy most of the time and my last 5 lbs pounds of baby weight just won't budge and it is driving me nuts.  

- Last night while we were laying in bed Matt told me my hair smelled gamey.  and proceeded to give me a lecture on washing it more often.   It made me laugh I hate washing my hair!
 
- Sterling has been taking one on one swim lessons and still can't swim.  He cries and makes such a scene and it stresses me out.  I want him to learn to swim on his own and he could care less.  I was actually embarrassed yesterday the way he acted, crying like a baby and would not even try anything.

- If you have kids do you ever truly have a clean house?  I feel like there is crap in every corner of my house.  I spend so much time picking it up just to find more junk pulled out.

- I used to love to read magazines.  Now I find when I get in bed it is hard for me to concentrate on anything.  I like to zone out and not concentrate.  I rarely watch tv anymore and honestly just want to sit in silence and play on my phone.  I have a stack of like 20 magazines I still need to read.

- I spend way more time on my phone than is necessary.  Sometimes I feel like it controls me and I am addicted to it.  I blame instagram I love the sneak peek into people's lives.

-I feel like my kids are growing up way too fast.  Frances Moon is 8 months now and so close to being one year.  I feel like the last year has flown by.  Sterling starts kindergarten in a year and that makes me sad.  I just want to freeze time and relish in this time period while they are young and innocent.

- I lay in bed at night and worry about the world ending and another world war.  All this weird weather, wild fires, shootings, plane crashes, and unrest over seas makes me anxious.  The world is a crazy place and I worry about the future for my kids.

- I have turned into a mom that raises her voice and yells sometimes.  I don't even realize I am doing it half the time Matt has to remind me.  I get so angry and have so little patience lately.  I hate that about myself.  I don't want to have a short temper with my kids. 

 - Marriage is so hard after you have kids.  I find I put so much time and effort into taking care of my kids and house when it comes time for Matt I am exhausted.  He gets home from work and I just want a break and silence. It is such a struggle to juggle kids and your husband.

- I don't love to run but I love the silence it brings me in the morning.  It is the only time of the day I am truly alone and it is so nice.  I am not a runner.  It is still hard for me to run one mile, but I do like how I feel afterwards. I feel like that alone time and exercise makes me happier and a better mom during the day.

-   I look forward to my glass of wine at the end of the day.  Is that wrong?
Like really I count down til 5:00 most days.  Some days it is 4:50.
 

 
- My sister and I are working on a cookbook together.  This is dream we have long had.  Hoping we can make it work, look good, and people will actually buy it!

- I am so over all the blog competition.  Can't we all be friends and all be successful?  This quote made me laugh so hard. Truth.  I love all my blogger friends.


Have a fabulous weekend.






59 comments:

Julia | Pawleys Island Posh said...

Girl!!!! You know I LOVE you in real life and in blog land. You are such an awesome person and I'm glad to call you friend.

Playground Prepster said...

My son screamed through two years of lessons - and never learned. It was awful. He finally learned in his own time and on his own terms (at 6 years old). And I get anxiety attacks about the future for our kids and their kids. Everything from countries at war to global warming to school shootings makes me freak. And I can't read magazines anymore either. It makes me sad not to have the time but there is so much to do (and honestly doesn't the phone just feel productive - even if it isn't). Loved this post! And can't wait for the cookbook! I realized I have so many of your recipes pinned!!

Samma said...

I am totally the same with trying to reserve energy for my husband- I'm just so damn tired after kids' bedtimes.

E Hayes said...

You aren't alone on so many of these. Especially the kids/marriage ones. My confession, we are actually going out for dinner tonight, I'm pretty sure it's the first time out since having Kenley - 8 months ago.

Ashley Brown said...

Love this!

Jamie said...

I can relate to so many of your confessions! The one comment you made that got me really excited though was hearing that you're working on a cookbook! I have often made recipes you have posted and have never been disappointed. Several have become weekly staples for us. I've never commented on your blog before, but wanted to let you know that I'll definitely buy your cookbook!

Cory said...

WOW! I seriously LOVED everything about this post. Thanks for your rawness and true feelings. Many of us moms are RIGHT THERE WITH YOU!!! I really enjoy reading your blog and seeing your recipes. And I will absolutely buy your cookbook when it comes out. I seriously fix one of your meals once a week!

Ashley said...

So awesome to hear that you and your sister are working on a cookbook! I’ll be buying that one! Totally with you on blog competition... unnecessary. There’s room for everyone to succeed.

Christina M. said...

Love your honesty. Sidenote I was showing my husband pictures of Frances and he thought she was a fake doll she looks so cute! It was hilarious and he still didnt believe me lol!

pineapplestyleblog.com said...

that is fabulous about the cookbook! y'all will be like the southern gwyneths. i am nervous about balancing life after our first baby comes in just a few short weeks. and i am with you on magazines...i just can't sit down and go through them anymore. it's all about the PHONE! ugh. i can't wait to drink wine again.

Lauren Dumas said...

I can totally relate to most of your confessions! We have one baby girl 9 months old and once the hubs gets home I am ready or a break and some quiet time. If I ever get a night alone (sometimes my hubs parents watch our daughter for the night) all I want to do is sit in silence. Also, I am a swim lesson instructor- have been for many years- I have dealt with SO many screaming children over the years- they are very scared and as a parent you just want them to be brave and try what they are being taught, but sometimes they just aren't ready yet and you have to deal with it. You could get in the pool with him and try some of the things the instructor is trying to teach on your own if it's a trust issue with the instructor maybe? Sometimes if the child doesn't know the teacher it's just not going to happen. Keep trying and if it doesn't happen this summer, try again! They have lessons year round at St. Andrews, MUSC.. def. don't give up! :) Hang in there mama!

Nat said...

Love this- I actually just did a confessions post yesterday. I think so many of us can relate to these! I have such a short temper also, and sometimes I wonder if I'm really cut out to be a stay home mom. I miss adult conversation and getting dressed for work!

heather rubel said...

Thanks for the honest and refreshing post this Friday!

Sweet Southern Prep said...

That is so cool you and Taylor are going to create a cookbook! Your meals are always so tasty looking. I'd buy it! :)

As for running, I wouldn't consider myself a runner either. You'll surprise yourself the more you run. You'll be able to run longer and faster.

Happy Weekend!

Dina said...

Did you wrote this or did I?!!!! I had to google tips on not yelling the other night, it wears me down and obviously doesn't work with my kids! I can't wait for your book :-) And I've had to stop reading certain blogs because of all the blog drama…it's supposed to be fun, right?!!

iopcatg said...

I LOVE this post! And I have to agree with you about blogland. I feel like a pariah sometimes...and don't know why! Solidarity rules...so does gamey hair! Keep doing what you are doing-you are a total inspiration!
Happy Weekend, Catherine
http://www.laviebythesea.com

caycee said...

Love this and love you more!!! So excited for you and Tay, girl I may even start to cook for real if you do :)

Leslie said...

I think you are an amazing person, and you do a wonderful job juggling all that you do!

Chicago Mom (Heather) said...

I love this!! Try being 45 and losing weight. I have just had to accept that I'm going to be 5 pounds over my "ideal" weight and live with it.

Marriage is harder after kids and I get envious of all the huge beautiful houses online too.

I'm also addicted to my phone. I told my husband I think our smart phones are actually the devil in disguise.

Wow - you wait until 4:50? I drink wine at 4:00. It's 5:00 on the east coast. :-)

Lindsay said...

Who says you can have a drink til 5:00?? :) Some days it is appropriate much, much sooner.

Emily said...

Oh my gosh, I cannot wait for your cookbook! Y'all have to do it!! Your pictures on your blog are already so great and every recipe I have ever made from here is absolutely delicious!! I made your chicken, wild rice, and sausage casserole last week (loved it as did my husband!!) and told about 5 of my friends about how good it was. Well, Tuesday rolled around and I'm eating lunch with one of my friends I had shared the recipe with and I peeked at her lunch, saying, "mmm, that looks good" and she started laughing and told me it was your casserole (she added in broccoli)!! Love it! Keep up the great work and I love your honesty!!

Angie said...

OMG!!! I LOVE LOVE LOVE your blog! And I am wanting to do a girls trip to Charleston, looks so charming!

Young and Entertaining said...

Your honesty is so refreshing! How exciting that you're working on a cookbook- I will definitely buy it! How are you going to publish it? I self published one a few years ago just for gifts for friends and family, but i'd love to hear more about your plans!

Jillian Manesh said...

that's awesome that you are working on a cookbook! congrats! i cant wait to buy it :) have the best weekend! xo jillian - cornflake dreams

Alicia xoxxo said...

Ohhh I love these posts! So good! Here goes:
I have started to become a "screamer" too. I am ashamed. I never wanted to be that mom that loses her patience with her child. But I am. This last week has been hard bc hubs has been out of town and its just been me. I pray for patience.
I get up extra early in the morning just so I can have alone time with my coffee and the internet.
I am way too addicted to my iPhone too.
Owen is starting preschool in the fall and I am already sad about it. What am I gonna do without my sidekick?
I can relate to a lot of these. Have a great weekend Natalie!

Lucy said...

Mine- totally agree about becoming a yeller. I don't want to but I swear sometimes they don't hear you until you are about to lose it! Also, I CANNOT wait for my daughter to start preschool this year. It's only from 9 to noon 2 days a week but I am looking forward to having some me time for the first time in 2 years!

Nickie said...

It took my daughter 3!! years of swimming lessons to finally learn to swim. The peace of mind I have now makes it all worth while. Hang in there!
My house is always cluttered and is in need of some repairs and it ain't getting done any time soon. I have made peace with this (it was hard getting to this point) and just focus HOURLY on my blessings. I use to read all the time too and now as soon as my head hits the pillow, I'm out!! I don't know why I keep buying books.....
I finally decided to limit my time online. I now only read my 3 favorite blogs daily (yes, you are one of them ;) ) and that is it. I was getting very depressed and envious by what I saw online and that is NO way to be.
I love your blog and your honesty. There is no doubt you are just as beautiful on the inside as the outside and that you are an amazing mom and wife. Life is just one big adventure and a continuous lessons to learn.
CAN NOT wait until your cookbook comes out. So glad you are writing one!! Have a great weekend!!

Natalie Carson said...

Love this list, i feel the same way about the magazines, they just pile up. I am a working mom of one boy, 2 years old. And I find it impossible to find time for myself.
Your blog is my favorite. Please do an event in Chicago!

Lili said...

LOVE THIS! i have a ton of confessions too.....warrants its own blogpost!

Sara Mueller said...

You are always on point! It's like you read my mind! Happy weekend Natalie!

Kris M. said...

As far as losing weight, I am always so impressed by the quality of your food but it looks like you have way too much food on your plate--even for salads! If you cut down your quantity , you will lose! You've got the variety and types of food you should eat nailed, just too much.

Emily Lott said...

This is so awesome! We met the other night at the Eclectic Charleston blogger get together and it's so nice to learn that your favorite bloggers are actually real people too.

PS - SO excited for your cookbook!! I'll definitely pick up a copy :)

Emily
www.cooperthames.com

Krystine @ www.KrystineEdwards.com said...

This made me smile. I am the same way on so many of these and I worry about the world ending - especially when there's an insane thunder lighting storm 😳

Mama Dean said...

I don't think I've ever commented - but have been reading a long time. This is my favorite post of yours I think I've read. The first step to getting a better handle on the anxiety is to recognize what issues are on your mind. Silence and peace are good, but if you find it becomes a time when it's so quiet that anxious thoughts permeate your mind - then get your mind busy. You're not alone, just one of the brave few who is willing to admit to not being perfect. Hang in there.

natasha {schue love} said...

God, I miss my glass of wine! And SO exciting about your cookbook!!!

natasha {schue love} said...

God, I miss my glass of wine! And SO exciting about your cookbook!!!

Lee Nodes said...

I was shaking my head yes, and saying "uh-huh, yep" to almost all of these. Love how real, honest and hilarious you are sweet girl! And don't give up on Sterling swimming! My almost 10 year old son was just like that during swim lessons. Now he swims like a fish! I used to get so embarrassed of the screaming and crying, and now I look back at that time and laugh so hard. I don't have a blog, but used to, and don't know how y'all do it now with all of the competitiveness. I used to read a lot more, but dumped the ones that don't seem like real people I can relate too. I mean, how much stuff do we need. I've also made a commitment to get off of instagram and my phone when my boys are around and when I'm hanging with my husband at night. The time is flying by and is way too precious for me to be spending time on my phone. Thanks for sharing! You rock!

francyface said...

Thank you for sharing all of this! As I read all of these I just think 'yep, that's me'...so glad to know I'm not alone. Having 2 under 2, there are moments where I just don't have the energy or patience to be the mom/wife/friend/person that I want to be. Thank goodness for wine!
Super-exciting about the cookbook - I will definitely be buying! We have not been disappointed by any of your recipes!

BLovedBoston said...

Your cookbook will be amazing - I can't wait!!

Andrea Johnson said...

Nodding my head while reading your blog post! Except for the wine at 4:50, it can be 4:30 for me some days😉. Can't wait for the cookbook!

English said...

I love all these comments! Being a mom is the hardest job- there is never enough of you to go around and your husband is a grown up. Someday they will be off at college and you and your husband will have plenty of time. Enjoy your kids. And the only people I know with kids and clean houses are OCD and can't sleep unless their house is clean. I feel sad for them :) People like coming to my house because they know it's welcoming but not neat- makes them feel comfortable and that's what entertaining is all about! Love your blog and your precious kids.

Tara {The Silver Lining} said...

Great post Natalie! I have to confess that I stalk your baby Frances because she is so darn cute!! I was also showing her to my mom the other day, who agreed on how adorable she is. She's just so beautiful, I can't get enough. Have a great weekend.

www.thewowie.com said...

I hate to wash my hair too. You should try Oribe Cote d'Azur hair refresher. It smells so wonderful that I've considered huffing it.

noey meirowsky said...

Great post! Love your honesty.

Hopesdope said...

Thank you for your honesty! We all have these same/similar struggles and while I love the blogs that I follow, it get AWFULLY TIRESOME reading about all of the supposed perfection going on in others lives. Your confessions are refreshing and welcomed and we can ALL relate. Thank you for sharing and being REAL!

Momma P said...

Yes to every one of these! I feel so drained at the end of the day that I don't want to be touched by my husband. I keep repeating "this time too shall pass". Keep on keeping on girl, I love your blog and IG!!

Momma P said...

Yes to every one of these! I feel so drained at the end of the day that I don't want to be touched by my husband. I keep repeating "this time too shall pass". Keep on keeping on girl, I love your blog and IG!!

Amy {Fresh and Fancy} said...

Loved reading these - It's nice to know we all struggle with a lot of the same things sometimes :)

Heather F. said...

It's like you read my mind! Thanks for being honest, it makes me feel so much more NORMAL!

Unknown said...

Love these posts! Thanks for being honest - it's so refreshing. Can't wait for that cookbook to come out. We already have a bunch of your meals on repeat.

Jennifer said...

A friend posted this on FB a few weeks ago and I could relate to every single word. Hang in there mama! You're not alone! Enjoy those early runs and make time to work on your cookbook. Actually MAKING something always seems to help me.

http://www.kbaer.com/2014/07/09/when-you-are-tightly-wound/

Kate said...

natalie- as I have said before, thanks for being real! I also experience similar anxiety and finally decided to go on a super low dose of zoloft after my second son was born about two years ago. it has made such a positive difference, as has yoga/barre classes as many times as week as I can squeeze in. there's a huge connection for me between feeling like I look good, and actually feeling sane. I think being a mother just amplifies those fears- child, marriage, world related -100x. Also- my older son (4.5 yrs) has struggled with the swim lessons- one day he tried a big kids pair of goggles (the 'lil predator' by Zoggs) and it just clicked. Once he got over the fear of getting his face wet, I can't get him out of the pool. We practice every single day at the town pool, where I keep him in a lightweight speedo life jacket. He does most of the work, it just makes him feel more secure. Let Sterling pick a pair or color of the goggles and promise him a prize if he meets a progress goal by the end of the week (floating on his back for 5 seconds, 10 head bobs under the water, whatever it is). Keep it up, having him swim safely on his own will be one less anxiety to keep you up at night. oh, and never feel guilty for enjoying your wine (or tequila). I'm right there with ya! xoxo- kate aka YesLets

Krcat said...

Natalie,
I have been reading your blog for a while now but have never commented. I love looking at your fashion and home suggestions but most of the time things on your blog are way out of my price range so it's more for fun. I thank you so much for this post because it made me realize how real you are! Yes maybe you have more expensive things then I do and live in an amazing place right by the beach but the feelings and struggles you have are just like mine. I have a 13 month old daughter who all of a sudden at the age of one decided she was going to go from the best sleeper in the world to a kid who doesn't want to go to bed at night. Or sometimes she does down but wakes up for 2 hrs in the middle of the night. It is so hard because I am so tired and struggle so much to have patience. Time for my husband?? Forget about that... And we have only been married 2 years so that scares me to death. It is so comforting to know that there are so many other moms out there who struggle like I do. It's the hardest thing I've ever done.... The best... But definitely the hardest! Thank you for making me feel like I'm not alone. Krista

Unknown said...

Hi Natalie,

Former swim teacher here. Are you staying with Sterling during the swim lessons? I noticed another reader recommended getting in the pool with Sterling and the teacher. That works sometimes. Also, some kids do better if their parent leaves. I taught for years, and never had a child not at least learn survival swimming. Every child is different, you just need to try a few things. Including perhaps a new teacher if Sterling never clicks with the one you have.

Susan

CherBear said...

I so appreciate your comittment to being true to yourself in your blog & keepin it real. I've tried many of the recipes you have shared, and have loved all of them! Definitely would buy the book!

WizardofBoz said...

Would by your cookbook in a hot minute!

Katie said...

I wished I could find joy in running! Ugh, just not for me. I seriously struggled with my last 5 pounds as well (My Charlotte is about the same age as your little girl). Finally, I found something amazing for my body and got rid of those pesky pounds! You can do it!

Albertina M. Cisneros said...

OMG I loved this!! I also worry about all this unrest in other parts of the world...I fear a third world war could happen at any time...

Katie said...

Appreciate your honestly, as always. As a long time reader, this is why I come back every day. You are real and I can relate to you.

I struggle as a mom of a 4 year old and almost 2 year old. It is so darn hard sometimes and it's true that marriage becomes harder. As much as I love the summer and spending time with my family, I secretly cannot wait until September when kids go to preschool so I can have some alone time.

Keep doing what you're doing because you have a great heart and and a lovely family! :)

P.S. My wine starts at 4:30 ;)